Back to Work

On Mon, Jan 6, 2014, I returned to the office. It has since been one full work week. I worked from home on Thurs & Fri Jan 2-3 so that we can have a trial run and it was a good thing we did, to iron out any kinks. There were a couple of things that worried me about returning:

1. At the moment, Allison would feed for only 5 minutes before crying in pain from teething. I worried she may not eat enough, which I needed in order to sleep train her during that same time period. 
2. I worried that she would not be happy that her mom wasn't around and worried that she would give her grandmother a hard time (i.e. crying a lot)
3. My biggest concern about returning back to work is that work demands would not allow me to have a work-life balance that I need. I do not want to work beyond normal hours of 9-5pm. 

I was prepared to consider leaving my job if it proved too difficult to be away. Praise be to God that everything is working out very well and that I feel very comfortable going back to work now. 

1. Mom was able to feed her a bottle right when she woke up and was still sleepy and she finished a full amount! Mom joked that she passed the test and won't be fired, hehe. Coincidentally, the first day I was away, Allison stopped having feeding pain and could finish a whole bottle even while awake. 
2. Allison has absolutely no problem with my mom and they get a long just fine. Mom keeps her entertained by singing, taking, praying, playing activities to help with development, etc. 
3. Also coincidentally, Allison slept through the night for the first time.. the night leading up to my first day back. Amazing. 
4. I spoke to my manager about my needs and they will try to be understanding. The projects for this year are more "business as usual"and not high profile therefore should be more manageable, which means not too stressful. 
5. I plan to work from home on Tues and Thurs so that I can see baby during the day. This alleviates the fact that I don't see her most of the day on Mon, Wed, and Fri. It also allows my mom to come a little later and leave a little earlier 2x a week b/c the days that I do go in the office, she has to come a little earlier and leave a little later. 
6. At this age, her daytime schedule is getting very regular and makes it very easy for the caretaker to know what to do next. Right now she eats every 2 hours, has 4 naps with predictable duration and predictable awake time duration. 

My first day in the office was ok. I quickly figured out the "mother's room" logistics w.r.t. pumping. During the day I am distracted with work so I didn't miss the baby as much. But when I came home and saw her, I felt so sad for being away. I was just glad to WFH the next day. The days I do go in, I rush home to make it in time to see her before I have to put her to bed. At that time she is tired from the day so is not as playful. I would say that I see her for about 30 mins in the morning and 30 mins in the evening. Again, so glad I can see her more during the day on Tues and Thurs. I also nurse her on those days. 

About the idea of taking off the first year... I think it's for the best that I don't. The baby and my mom are healthy and getting along, I really have no reason to. It would be harder for an older baby to get used to someone else after being alone with their mom for so long.  Being away for 4 months, I felt a little rusty getting back into work topics; being away for a year would be even harder. Since I would eventually go back to work after 1 year, it will just make it even harder to want to go back; it may even affect my confidence in my skills, especially if I have to interview for a new job. 

how grandma keeps her head warm, hahaha

way to sleep on the job, grandma. hahahah